Wanting You

I don't want to want you.
I want to go to sleep.
I want to finish a movie
Without checking my phone
For a message I know
Isn't coming.
I want to write a poem
About anything other
Than you.
I don't want to want
You to want me either.
Leave me alone.
You've enslaved the
Insides of my eyelids.
I can close them against
The harsh summer sun
Or this still, humid night,
But I cannot close them
Against you.
I'm supposed to be free,
Lone Wolf howling at the Moon.
Now the Moon longs for you,
I'm left with nothing to howl to.
You've taken all the songs,
You own Neruda, and Yeats,
Rumi forsook Shams and whirls
Raising clouds of words for you
To walk through.
You linger in my daylight,
You dance in my darkness.
I drive through filthy streets,
With your eyes in my rearview.
I'm waiting for you tonight,
While my tomorrows waste away.
I don't want to want you.
But I never understood wanting,
Until I wanted you.