Tell Me Something

Tell me the truth dear. Tell me how it came to be, that you and I find ourselves, here. Where the illusions crumble and the masks disappear. Where your words are the ropes that will bind me, and your smiles the demons I fear. Tell me why I push you away, when all I want is to keep you near? Tell me why we're all so fucked up, and only seem to get worse, year after year. Tell me something real, love. Something you've held back from every other ear. Tell me the secrets to your garden and what lies in the hinterlands of your soul, beyond who you seem to be and how you choose to appear. Tell me why you say you love me, when I'm everything that you should fear? Tell me why a walk in the park with you, might as well be my life's one true quest, my holy mission into a lawless frontier. If you were a religion, I couldn't be your priest, or your prayer. I'd be the one living in a forest or a cave, a half crazed fakir. Singing songs no one understood and only the birds would ever hear. Writing sacred words with a faithless pen, building stone boats off a desert pier. I thought I was strong. I thought I had it all figured out. Then you smiled and it hit me, that I had never known what any of it was ever about. I thought I had heard it all before, the great songs, the heavenly dances, the speeches from the classics, so pure they would make my ears sing. Now look at me, stumbling with my own name, playing court jester to little men, a filthy squire to a rodent king. I got lost in these streets, with no one looking to find me. Then I ran into you, and took leave of all my other senses, thank you ever so kindly.